Online Dating for Singles

Judge Throws Out Lawsuit Against Don't Date Him Girl

(Online Dating for Singles) A judge has thrown out a lawsuit brought against the Website Don't Date Him Girl, alleging defamation of character. You can read about the lawsuit at the Online Dating Industry blog. The dismissal came on a technicality - that the lawsuit was filed in the wrong state. As a result, it may be re-filed.

Here are a couple of good articles on Don't Date Him Girl:

Unethical Website of the Month - Don't Date Him Girl

Don't Date Him Girl Flaws

Unconventional Approach to Dating - Pretend Girlfriend

One San Diego man, fed up with not being able to find the next love of his life, has taken an unconventional approach to dating.  Instead of setting up a profile online looking for a woman to fall in love with him, he has posted a personals ad on Craigslist indicating that he wants a "pretend girlfriend" to travel with.  From an article in the San Diego Union-Tribune:

"He was looking for a “pretend girlfriend,” his ad announced, someone to travel with him to exotic locales like the Caribbean or Central America. He made one thing perfectly clear: “I'm NOT looking for sex of any kind.” The job description, however, did include holding hands on the beach and sharing an occasional kiss in “romantic spots around the world.” In exchange for such companionship, the ad said, he was willing to pay all travel expenses – plus an unspecified fee."

I am not quite sure how to feel about this strategy.  On the one hand, I can sympathize with someone who feels they have tried everything and still can't find a partner, but, on the other hand, he may be setting himself up for disappointment.  The man claims he has come to terms with the fact that he will probably never fall in love again, but, I can't help but think that deep down he may be hoping that the women he chooses to travel with will fall in love with him during their trip. 

Regardless of his motives, this is definitely a unique way to meet women and, hopefully, both parties end up having a fun, memorable time traveling together. 

Biological Factors in Relationships

Ever wonder why your long term relationship sometimes loses its spark?  Or why most couples divorce after year 4 of marriage?  According to the latest "Dating From The Inside Out" column on Online Dating Magazine, it could be biological.  From the article:

"Biology, working against us, continues to persuade us to ruin perfectly good relationships in pursuit of its procreation goals. The basic neurochemical reward for engaging in passionate sex is a blast of dopamine to the “pleasure/reward” center of the “primitive brain.” In rat studies, the mechanism has been known to work so well that it’s been found that allowing a rat to stimulate the “pleasure/reward” part of its brain without constraint, it can “delight” itself to death without even stopping to eat.

"Based on the above, can we then surmise that biology really serves our best survival interests when it encourages that sort of chemically addictive scenario? It has now been argued that this compelling, chemical reward mechanism that worked well for distant forbearers in relation to the scarcity of food and sex, now actually creates havoc in the modern world. It may be precisely what is behind other social addictions such as gambling, food, alcohol and drug excesses, obesity, and the like."

This may seem as if all relationships are ruled by our instincts, but author explains that "harmonious relationships offer far greater rewards than biology’s mere empty disadvantages" and that we have the power to pick between remaining loyal and thrills of intimate union.  In any case, the most important thing is to find balance and understand what makes you feel most comfortable. 

Love@AOL's Best and Worst Date Cities for Singles

Love@AOL has just released the results from its "Dating Index". Based on regionalized surveys in 20 key markets, the Love@AOL "Dating Index" measures where a single person is most likely to have a good or bad date. Survey respondents were asked to give their city a "Dating GPA," based on things like ease of getting dates within the region, number of places to go out on dates, and so on. The individual grades were tallied with answers to a number of other dating-related questions. The cities were then ranked in the Love@AOL survey's "Dating Index."

Some notable changes in the rankings this year: New York has changes from a "Best Dating City" in 2005 to a "Worst Dating City" on this year's list. And Washington D.C. has changed from a top ten "Best" ranking in 2005 to achieving the dubious honor of being the #1 "Worst City For Dating" in 2006. Atlanta continues to earn its "Hotlanta" nickname, holding its position as the No. 1 "Best Dating City" for the second year in the row. Los Angeles also holds steady, keeping its second place ranking for the second year.

The complete lists:

The Worst Dating Cities for Singles:

1.   Washington, D.C.

2.   Minneapolis/St. Paul

3.   Phoenix

4.   Miami

5.   Tampa

6.   Cleveland

7.   Sacramento

8.   New York City

9.   Chicago

10.  Seattle

The Best Dating Cities for Singles:

1.   Atlanta

2.   Los Angeles

3.   Houston

4.   Detroit

5.   Dallas/Ft. Worth

6.   Orlando

7.   Philadelphia

8.   San Francisco

9.   Denver
10. Boston

Want to Get Married? Try eHarmony

A new poll done by Harris Interactive shows that over 33,000 eHarmony members married in a twelve month period ending August 31, 2005.  This averages out to 90 singles marrying each day that were introduced to their partner through eHarmony. 

Dr. Neil Warren, eHarmony founder (and the guy you see on all the commercials), said that the poll results were "a true testament to the effectiveness of eHarmony's patented Compatibility Matching System(TM). It is also further proof of what I have learned over 35 years of working with married couples and that is broad based compatibility is the key to finding the love of your life."

Harris conducted a nationwide poll of people who married between September 1, 2004 and August 31, 2005 and this research found that 16,630 marriages resulted from eHarmony matches during this period.  So, it looks like eHarmony is a pretty good choice for those of you looking to find your future marriage partner. 

New Jersey Online Daters Have New Venue for In-Person Meetings

Attention all New Jersey singles - it was announced today that online dating service TheMeetery.com has teamed up with has teamed up with The Sandbar restaurant and WADB –AM Radio 1310 to take "online dating off the web and into the streets."

On Thursday January 26, 2006 from 7:00pm to 9:00pm TheMeetery.com will host a singles event at  The Sandbar 201 Union Lane, Brielle, NJ. This makes the first time that TheMeetery.com in conjunction with WADB-AM Radio 1310 is hosting such an event.

For those of you unfamiliar with TheMeetery.com, here's a bit of info. TheMeetery.com is based on the concept of using a eatery as a meeting place for dates, i.e. meetery.  The service is free for subscribers to register and, once registered, the daters browse each other’s profiles and if they would like to meet, they have to upgrade to a paid subscription.

When ready to meet their match, members of TheMeetery.com choose the restaurant through another matching system, selecting the zip code and other preferences from the database.

January a Tough Month for Relationship Partners

An article in the Toronto Star has warned those currently in relationships that January is known by some therapists, sociologists, and relationship advisers as the break-up month.  Apparently, January is a time when many couples end their relationships.  It is seen as a "new start" time, just before the lovey-dovey Valentine's Day romances.  If you have found yourself the victim of a January break-up, note that you aren't alone. From the article:

The season of heartbreak affects the ordinary and the famous. Brad and Jen dropped the bombshell of their breakup last January. Ben Affleck saw two very public relationships go south after the holidays — with Gwyneth Paltrow in January 1999 and Jennifer Lopez at the dawn of 2004. Tom Cruise and Nicole Kidman ended their relationship a week before Valentine's Day in 2001, then Cruise broke up with Penelope Cruz in January 2004. Alec Baldwin and Kim Basinger? Splitsville in January.

Jamie Braman, executive director of Maryland's Upscale Singles, a group for single professionals over 30, says her membership always spikes at the beginning of the year. Men in particular, she says, have told her they're loath to break up over the holidays, "because this way they have a guarantee of a date and things to do over the holidays. They break up after New Year's and before Valentine's Day, because there's no way they're going to sit there at Valentine's Day and buy a gift and pretend they're into this person."

For the full article, click here.

Farmers Finally Find Dates

While online dating is popular for many singles across the country, there may be at least one demographic that always feels a bit left out - farmers.  An article in USA Today brings to light some of the isolation felt by farmers who venture into the online dating world only to be disappointed when they are constantly matched with "city folk" who can't relate to their farmer lifestyle.

Single farmers may have found a solution to their online dating woes with FarmersOnly.com - an online dating site specifically targetted toward farmers and those who love them.  According to the article:

"Although big websites boast thousands of members, single farmers — already dating-challenged by virtue of their isolation and long work hours — find slim pickings.

Until farmersonly.com founder Jerry Miller tapped into a real need.

While city folk might think their dating scene is a minefield of complications, single farmers can beat their worst tale of woe. Try traveling 200 miles round-trip for a dance. Or breaking a date on account of a sick steer."

If you're a farmer who hasn't had much luck with online dating, maybe FarmersOnly.com is what you need.  Learn more about it and read some experiences other farmers have had in the full USA Today article. 

Dr. Phil Joins the Online Dating World as Relationship Expert

For those of you who watch Dr. Phil's television show religiously for tips and insight into what he considers healthy relationships, you may be pleased to learn that Dr. Phil will now be helping online daters.  Dr. Phil has just signed on with popular online dating service Match.com to provide relationship advice and help to its members in the new MindFindBind advice area of the site. 

Match.com explains that "the insights, tips and techniques that are the heart of MindFindBind™ with Dr. Phil" were developed and created to help you Match.com members "take your relationships in a new direction, and make the most of the Match.com community."

A small sample of the MindFindBind work in action is available for non-members, but in order to review all the advice and insight it looks like you need to sign up.  The new service includes video segments from Dr. Phil and workshops to help you learn more about your dating and relationship style. 

Premarital Snooping Popular in Shanghai

For those of you thinking about tying the knot, a recent article from the United Press International may be of interest.  Running background checks on your potential spouse (and sometimes your children's fiancees) is becoming an increasingly popular new trend in Shanghai.  From the article:

"In a recent online poll to which 3,338 people responded, 1,908 said they would use investigative services because modern society had made people superficial and untrustworthy. The other 1,430 voters opposed them, saying marriage should be based on trust."

For the full article, click here.